An American Nightmare: The Story of Scary Mommy and The Sex Offender

Can Bad Men Change? What It’s Like Inside Sex Offender Therapy

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  • See a Problem?
  • An American Nightmare: The Story of the Scary Mommy and the Sex Offender
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    • Collins refused to abide by these conditions and again his parole was violated.

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    Collins was again taken into custody and served 8 days in jail for the parole violation. Collins refused to stay at the transition center resulting in his arrest. For this parole violation, he served 12 days in the Marion County Jail. Collins was ordered to report to his parole officer. When he failed to show for that appointment the parole officer submitted for an arrest warrant. Collins remained in contact with his parole officer despite his refusal to abide by his living conditions.

    Oregon has the most sex offenders per capita in the U. KATU discovered he's had a series of problems since getting out of prison on Sept. He said Hahn-Collins held the mother and child at knifepoint starting late Friday afternoon. Once inside, he said she began mouthing the words "help me" to customers who called He described the kidnapping as a unique, scary and traumatic incident.

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    City Council unanimously passes ordinance to reduce single-use plastics in Portland. Driver charged in deadly crash on T. Should he ask her out on a date? One of the men in his early 30s argues that the receptionist has to be friendly to do her job. Jennifer points out that the receptionist is in an impossible position: After each weekly discussion, Cheryl and Jennifer give homework assignments, such as asking participants to fill in a timeline of high and low moments in their lives, or writing a statement from the perspective of their victims.

    Lately, they have asked their patients to discuss the dozens of men who are making headlines for alleged sex crimes. Matt watched the trial of Larry Nassar, the USA Gymnastics doctor who was sentenced to up to years in prison for molesting more than women and girls. The consensus in this group, which includes men who trafficked in child pornography and men who assaulted their stepdaughters, is that Nassar is a monster. Sex-addiction treatment is designed to help people with impulse-control issues and, like Alcoholics Anonymous, focuses on abstinence and avoiding triggers.

    An American Nightmare: The Story of the Scary Mommy and the Sex Offender

    Experts emphasize that men who commit crimes like rape, assault and indecent exposure should receive sex-offender therapy, not sex-addiction therapy. The only way for them to get better and to lessen their risk to society, therapists say, is to confront what they have done, not excuse it.

    People have been sharing their problems with Cheryl all her life, even before she was a therapist. During a session, she lets every emotion show, frowning in sympathy and rolling her eyes when patients try to fool her. She began her career working with children who had been abused.

    When first offered a chance to work with sex offenders, she refused. But she decided to go to a session out of curiosity. But when she arrived, the men looked like her neighbors and friends, and some genuinely wanted to change. She decided to take on the challenge, and later she and Jennifer started up a practice. They both still work with survivors and know that the damage these men have wrought on their victims cannot be undone.

    Think of how your victim feels. Others instruct their patients to role-play as their victims. Cheryl opts for a more personal approach. When Rob was 20 years old, he partied a lot. He spent one year in prison for statutory rape and another two for parole violations. He does electrical work now, thanks, he says, to the therapy he once dismissed. Cheryl asks Rob how treatment has helped him to take responsibility for what he did. What do you think the impact would be on them, meeting someone like you when you were 20?

    I was drinking, using drugs. I just wanted to get my rocks off. I used what I had to my advantage when I wanted. Did I trick her into a dark alley? But I had nice things. I was able to buy the drugs and alcohol. So yes, I did trick her. This patient, Cheryl says, had a moment of self-realization. I just—it would be hard. Cheryl has observed these sorts of conversations between assailant and survivor before at the request of both parties and believes they have the potential to be healing. Some victim advocates are skeptical.

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    Sex-offender therapists and victim advocates are often on opposite sides on questions of crime, punishment and rehabilitation, though both ultimately hope to reduce sexual violence. The data on treatment is limited, but what there is points toward the value of therapy. While there are no recent, official statistics on national sex-offender recidivism, an overview of studies looking at the numbers in Connecticut, Alaska, Delaware, Iowa and South Carolina found that the rate is about 3. That figure takes into account all crimes, including parole violations, not just sex crimes.

    In , research published in the American Journal of Public Health suggested that strict laws about registration, surveillance and residency can create a feeling of hopelessness and isolation that can actually facilitate re-offense. To many survivors and advocates, the experience of sexual assault is so horrifying that any recidivism risk is too high. For 45 years, he was a compulsive exhibitionist. He would visit movie theaters, sit next to a woman and masturbate once the lights dimmed. Kevin spent time in jail and psychiatric treatment centers but never went to prison.

    He managed to hold down a job as a clerk at a home-improvement store. Eventually, he stopped exposing himself, but not because of therapy. But Kevin says the sessions have helped him understand the motivation for his behavior.

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    He now believes that he exposed himself in the hopes of making a human connection, however irrational that may sound. They find it disgusting. Whether you believe that therapy can redeem someone like Kevin may depend on whether you believe people can learn empathy. Empathetic people are made, not born. Many of the men Cheryl and Jennifer counsel experienced emotional, physical or sexual abuse themselves when they were young.

    But there are no guarantees.

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    An American Nightmare: The Story of Scary Mommy and The Sex Offender - Kindle edition by Louella Thomas. Download it once and read it on your Kindle. Little children being trafficked and raped, by a sex offender, against a court order. An American Nightmare: The Story of Scary Mommy and the Sex Offender.

    In October, the Supreme Court will consider a complicated case challenging the federal laws that govern some sex offenders. The decision could allow hundreds of thousands of convicted offenders to move more easily across state lines and eventually remove their names from the sex-offender registry. He said the list constitutes cruel and unusual punishment because it can subject these men to ostracism and violence at the hands of the public and that it fails to properly distinguish between different types of offenses.

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    In response, attorneys general from six states wrote a joint amicus brief to overturn the ruling on appeal. In their brief, the attorneys general quote a judge from a separate case regarding sex offenders in Wisconsin: In an attempt to resolve the tension between public safety and individual redemption, the law has settled on an imperfect compromise: But they are also ordered to attend therapy to get better.

    The bad men are left in limbo. Inside the small taupe house, Cheryl and Jennifer work to move through that limbo, one conversation at a time. As the bright winter sun sets and the office grows cold, a group therapy session comes to a close 45 minutes after it was supposed to. The men rise from the worn couch and pull on their coats and hats.

    One has to head home to meet his parole-mandated curfew. The man with the ankle bracelet needs to charge his battery.

    They file out slowly, loose floorboards creaking under their feet. They might call their wives or bosses or parole officers. After those meetings end and the men leave the house for good, Cheryl and Jennifer may never know what becomes of them.