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But starting a conversation—and including some sly flattery—might work wonders. This is a tricky situation. This is where it comes in handy to know the different kinds of questions. Instead, you might ask these other kinds of questions, always in a conversational way. Ask for a narrative.
Where did you go? What did you do?
Just walked around and came back. What time did you go out? What did you see? Who did you meet? Also, if you catch her in a contradiction, you can question her further. I'm not here to debate the finer economic points of adult children accepting money from parents. Primarily because as a chronicler of awkward money conversations , it's my job to comment on etiquette and not circumstances.
I'm also not going to weigh in on if I think it's appropriate or not, because I'm an adult child who has accepted financial help from her parents. It also doesn't have to be a loan for a special project or living expenses.
More and more parents are gifting their children large home down payments, cash to minimize tax liability, and of course, shelling out for the booming wedding industry. But no matter what your circumstances, here are some tips for helping you navigate taking on loans from parents. Which is better than, say, taking money from friends. You can read about that here. I hate cliches, but in this instance I feel two are really appropriate: Timing is everything another cliche!
When inquiring into people's personal finances or broaching the topic of money it pays to pick your moment well, but don't catch them off guard. Warm them up by mentioning casually that you'd like to set some time to talk about finances, your estate, xyz. What works for you? Just because they're your parents doesn't mean you shouldn't treat it like a business meeting. No one likes to be taken by surprise. Even if they're Mom and Pop, even if they can totally afford to give you thousands of dollars, you should aim to pay them back.
The exception is, of course, if they give you money and tell you it's a gift. If it's a loan you should discuss with them a repayment timeline, finding out what they're comfortable with, if any interest is involved some parents do charge a very low amount of interest on principal and then when you'll be making payments.
One big lump sump annually? Once you've figured out how the loan is going to be structured, you need to put it in writing. This is the most crucial step!
I know this can be a pain who likes unnecessary paperwork, especially for someone as close as your Mom and Dad , but it helps keep things more business-like, which can come handy if the money ends up causing discord down the road. Besides, borrowing money is not the time to be ambiguous no matter who you take the money from.
Get your head out of your butthole.
When you don't have any money to buy what you want, you can always turn to your parents. Smiling let's your parents know that even though you want something, you are still . This will benefit you any time you want something from them. Getting what you want doesn't always happen and you should be open to getting turned down. If you do the You should know what your parents usually say yes or no to. . Whenever you pass by it, draw attention to it by commenting on it.
How to Pay Off Debt Fast: This depends on how close you are with your parents and how intimately they know the details of your own finances. I know for me, when I took money from my parents and was on a quarterly repayment plan, I felt guilty any time I mentioned I was going on a trip. This was a particularly wedding travel heavy year, and they never said or did anything that forced me to feel this way, but I did feel strange. I got very lucky in this respect that my parents chose not to pry, but honestly, if you're asking Mom and Dad for money, it opens the door for them to comment on how you're living your financial life.
Even though you're paying less in interest, you may be paying for it more in lack of privacy. Not to discourage you, but this is another thing to think about before you take on a loan from your parents. So my final tip is to tell you to prepare you for this consequence of taking money from family as opposed to say, a bank, or private online lender. You can get a better interest rate hopefully , but there are always going to be emotions involved. If you're a parent thinking about loaning money to adult children, I like this article from Market Watch. What do you think? Would you ever give a loan to a kid?
We did the things you suggest to make it as business-like as possible. I reluctantly accepted help a generous loan, not a gift with my down payment. Great thanks unto these great company who made it possible for me to upgrade my business i was stuck in a financial situation and i needed to refinance my business and pay my bills. Truly i want to thank Mr Barry More who seriously help me through and ensure i get the loan without delay.
Because the sooner that debt is gone, the better. Especially with no real deadline, that could be dangerous. Mine was the bank of grandma and it actually stressed me out more than loans with interest rates. I felt so guilty whenever I did something expensive — like in the middle of repaying her, I planned a trip to Peru.
Leave a Reply Cancel reply Your email address will not be published. If you choose a bad time, you may frustrate them even more and it will be less likely to get what you want. Sometimes we really are. Thank you, this article was very helpful. A Anonymous Jul 11, This will appear that you are being ungrateful.
She was not keen on me going, but we had set an amount I would pay her every month and at that point I was paying twice that to her without ever missing a payment. The worst that happened during the entire period of the loan was two months when I was unemployed and had to drop back to the minimum payment amount — but, being my grandma, she yelled at me for even giving her that at the time.
I say pay your parents back first.
Family and money can get awkward real quick. That is great that they were able to help you out in a hard time. I work so hard to pay off my debt and hustle hard to make sure I can handle my business. Good luck and just keep going. You will get where you need to be! I was put in this situation a few years ago See here: Honesty on both sides helps.
I think it is very common for parents to help their children. If I have a kid who is consistent-then I will give depending on the situation. I even have a line item in my budget for these moments. Even though personal loans are interest free, I like to pay them down first.