Turbulent Emotions

How to Find Truth in the Midst of Turbulent Feelings

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In the long run, of course, the inner self will shine through regardless, but in the brief span of a first date, interview, or meeting, only a sliver of the self is exposed — so why not do all that one can to make sure that it is the best sliver that one can offer? And while the anxiety of a Turbulent personality can be in itself defeating, if the pressure to perform proves to be so severe that they bow out at the last minute, for example, it can just as easily be the impetus that causes the Turbulent person to leave the impression of someone who cares enough to prepare — even overprepare — for something that matters.

Someone belonging to a Turbulent type may spend an hour agonizing over the perfect tie to wear to an event, and that one detail may be enough to catch the eye of someone important, even as the Assertive personality wrongly assumes that the spot of mustard on his tie will escape the notice of others, just as it escaped his.

Where Turbulent types can easily fall prey to impostor syndrome — the sense that their accomplishments, no matter how great, still do not make them an adequate fit for the role they currently inhabit — Assertive personalities typically have confidence to spare. And in a world where confidence is often valorized above all else, Assertive types seemingly possess an irrefutable edge over Turbulent ones.

Eventually, a person who has coasted on confidence will find that he or she has bitten off more than can be chewed, and without the ability or experience to back up his or her boasts, the individual can do little else but choke. As their own worst critics, Turbulent people tend to accept new responsibilities reluctantly, and thus are typically well-equipped to handle them, despite their misgivings.

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The need to do more, to have more, and to be more is ever-present, and while their efforts to satisfy this need can exhaust both themselves and the people around them, the ambition of Turbulent persons is often rewarded with success. For example, an Assertive guitarist may be a natural virtuoso, but largely ignorant of networking, marketing, and other aspects of the music business that a more Turbulent-minded musician feels compelled to study, unsure as he or she may be of his or her own talents.

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It may be the case that, while neither the Assertive nor the Turbulent musician might end up with a viable career in a rock band, the ancillary skills developed by the Turbulent one may lead to a fulfilling, lucrative stint as a promoter or manager. The Assertive type, on the other hand, may have little in the way of a back-up plan; if dissatisfaction is the hallmark of an ambitious mind, so too is it the case that too much confidence can breed complacency.

In the end, people with the Turbulent type variant would do well to accept themselves, even if such acceptance entails an understanding that they may never be able to match the lackadaisical, stress-free existence of someone with an Assertive personality. Instead, Turbulent types may wish to look for satisfaction not in satisfaction itself, but rather, in the search for satisfaction: Log in English Take the test What is your personality type?

Take the Test Log In. For the next 30 seconds think in detail about that incident. Try to picture what actually happened as vividly as you can, as if you were reporting it for a newspaper. Here you are the observer watching this event. You are not the event, the argument, or the emotional upset; you are merely witnessing what is happening from the perspective of your silent self.

You are carrying the effect of the meditation you just did, allowing you to maintain a vantage point that is not overshadowed by the quality of the emotions. Now identify exactly what you are feeling. Put some word on the incident that describes what you are experiencing. Be as precise as you can.

Develop Your Inner Radar to Control Turbulent Emotions

Do you feel unappreciated? Give the feeling a name. Come up with a word that epitomizes the painful experience. Focus your attention on that word. Gradually allow your attention to move away from the word.

The emotional turbulence of borderline personality disorder

Let your attention wander into your body. This is why we call it a feeling. It is because we feel emotions in our bodies. Locate the sensations the memory brings up.

The Turbulent Personality: Don’t Worry, Be Happy?

Some feel it as pressure in their throat. Now express that feeling. Place your hand on the part of your body where you sense that the feeling is located. You body knows it—every cell in your body knows it. Befriend these sensations and their wisdom, because the pain is actually leading you to wholeness. Writing your feelings out on paper is a valuable way to express the emotion.

This is especially effective when you can write out your painful experience in the first person, in the second person and finally from the perspective of a third person account. Be aware that any painful feelings you experience are your feelings. These feelings are happening inside your body now as you remember the pain, even though nothing is actually taking place in the material world. Even when the painful incident was occurring in the material world, the effect was entirely within you. You have choice in how you respond and interpret this emotional turbulence.

Oversensitive, or Just Sensitive Enough?

Recognizing this is taking responsibility for your feelings. Instead, it means that you recognize your ability to respond in new and creative ways. Taking responsibility for your feelings, you can also gain the power to make the pain melt away. Hold that understanding in your consciousness for the next few moments. Over the next 30 seconds, just feel the painful sensation leaving your body with every breath. Some people find that making an audible tone that resonates in that part of your body where the pain is localized helps to loosen and lift the contraction away.

You can also experiment to discover what works best for you. For others singing or dancing does the trick. You may try deep breathing, using essential oils, or a taking a long warm bath. Finally, if you have written out your emotions on paper, it can be useful to ritually burn the paper and offer the ashes to the winds. Sharing the outcome of releasing your pain is important because it activates the new pattern of behavior after the old painful pattern is released. Imagine that you could speak to the person who was involved in that original painful incident.

What would you say to that person now? The real cause was your response.

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