Running on Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect
Contents:
The dissatisfaction or disconnectedness that Webb describes is not the type that leads to debilitating clinical depression or even an occasional bluesy setback. This is, in a sense, a chronic condition that shapes the lifelong behaviors of many adults — even, again, those who were raised in a seemingly normal family environment and who are functioning members of society.
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The concept is based primarily upon attachment theory, which details the degree to which intimacy, safety, and connection needs should be met by parents from infancy. Harlow used rhesus monkeys to test the preference between a mother made of wire who provided food and a cloth mother who provided only warmth and no food. In each trial, the baby monkeys preferred the cloth mother over the wire mother, despite the lack of edibles. For more information on this study, take a look at the actual video footage of the Harlow experiment.
Running on Empty describes twelve parenting styles that can lead to emotional neglect, each one detailed with vignettes. No parenting style is perfect, but a look at the twelve problematic approaches Webb discusses can provide insight into both your own childhood as well as how you function as a parent, if you have kids.
Running on Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect
One point that Webb makes again and again is that all of the parents represented in her twelve problematic styles are, for the most part, well-intended — they want the best for their children. But in most cases, the emotional engagement is simply not there. Webb also offers a practical chapter for readers on how, as a mother or father, you can evaluate and, if needed, correct your own behaviors to avoid emotionally neglecting your children.
While Webb does a wonderful job explaining the new emotional neglect concept and identifying parenting styles that may lead to complications in adulthood, there is one major issue I found with the book: There is an undertone that all bad things that happen in adulthood should be blamed on bad parenting. Regardless of their earlier childhood environment, I believe adults are responsible for their own actions and behaviors — barring, of course, developmental disorders that require constant care.
Ros Johnson, LICSW, Therapist
Webb dances a tad too close to a slippery slope on this one. Still, I do not think that her intent is to completely absolve adults from responsibility, even if her writing sometimes points in that direction.
And other than that issue, I would recommend her book to anyone interested in parenting, childhood, their own lack of confidence or belonging, or what might have gone wrong. Want to buy the book or learn more?
Running on Empty : Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect
Check out the book on Amazon. If we are not filled up in childhood, we must fill ourselves as adults.
Running on Empty is the first self-help book about Emotional Neglect: an invisible force from your childhood which you can't see, but may be affecting you. Editorial Reviews. From the Author. Writing Running on Empty has been one of the most.
Otherwise we will find ourselves running on empty. What was missing from your childhood?
Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect may help you figure some things out. Emotional Neglect is the white space in the family picture; the background rather than the foreground. Emotions that are not acknowledged or expressed tend to jumble together and emerge as anger. Eventually, suppressed feelings refuse to stay down.
Running on Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect
When they do, they erupt as small spurts of irritability that hurt others. Children of addicted parents experience the lack of predictability as highly anxiety-provoking. As adults, they are therefore at significantly higher risk to have anxiety disorders and to become addicts themselves than are people who were raised by non-addicted parents.
- Childhood Emotional Neglect: “Running On Empty”.
- Essai sur lHistoire Religieuse des Nations Slaves (French Edition).
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