Distilled: A Poets Life with Prostate Cancer

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And pine trees have cones? Would dogs wag their tails When the master comes home? Would babies smile at mommies? Or young lovers hold hands? Or stars shine in our hearts? And strangely, his burdens were not so much! The Weary, Troubled Man was tired, And sat down on a stump to rest. He somehow remembered some joyous times That were among the best! When laughter came so quickly, And he stood straight and tall, When birds flew and breezes blew, And all troubles seemed so small. When his little ones smiled, and his hand was held, By the one whose love he had, When he laughed, and loved, and danced through life, And seemed never to be sad.

How was it that his life had changed, And his burdens grew and grew? And then he heard a distant laugh! And suddenly he knew! There was no magic; it was not a trick; The laughter was the key! If I can laugh, then I can dance, And my troubles will fall away, thought he! He jumped and ran after the Dancing Man, Dropping burdens as he went, His heart was light with stars so bright, And he was no longer bent! If women controlled medicine, one of the tests the men might have to undergo could look like this: Jelly Bean Theory on Li fe. This theory on life was originally told to Mac by a Marine flight instructor when he was but a Marine student aviator.

It was then the theory on flying but somehow it seems just as applicable to life in general: On the day you are born you are given a large bowl. In this bowl is placed several bags of white jelly beans, a handful of grey jelly beans and one black jelly bean. The white jelly beans represent good days, the grey jelly beans represent close calls, an accident, a serious illness etc. The black jelly bean represents the day you buy the farm.

Now every day you have to blindly take out a jelly bean. If you take stupid risks such as smoking or drinking and driving and so on you grab a handful of jelly beans instead of just one. Some people grab the black jelly bean early on and die at a young age. Some folks use up every bean in the bowl, but eventually, we all have to get to the black jelly bean. All of us diagnosed with prostate cancer have grabbed a few grey jelly beans - let's hope there are a lot more white ones left, and the black one is buried at the bottom.

What Cancer Cannot Do. Cancer is so limited. It cannot cripple love, It cannot shatter hope, It cannot corrode faith, It cannot destroy peace, It cannot kill friendship, It cannot suppress memories, It cannot silence courage, It cannot invade the soul, It cannot steal eternal life, It cannot conquer the spirit. FAQ on Health and Dieting. I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster.

Want to live longer? Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables? You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? And what are these? So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Beef is also a good source of field grass green leafy vegetable. Should I reduce my alcohol intake?

No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Well, if you have a body and you have body fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc. What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?

Can't think of a single one, sorry. Aren't fried foods bad for you? Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you? Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle? When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

Prostate Cancer Humor

Is chocolate bad for me? It's the best feel-good food around! Is swimming good for your figure? If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.. Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle? For those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies: The Japanese eat very little fat And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

The Mexicans eat a lot of fat And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. The Chinese drink very little red wine And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. The Italians drink a lot of red wine And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. The Germans drink a lot of beers and eat lots of sausages and fats And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

Speaking English is apparently what kills you! Given one of the principle problems faced by ageing men, and more so those who have had some treatment on their prostate, this innovation seems to have been a long time coming! Of course, for old dogs, it is a bit more difficult.

There is many an argument about which foods or supplements are good or bad for prostate cancer. Much of the material quoted in support of either of these views is based on studies that correlate statistics without demonstrating cause and effect. This piece sums up the dangers of that kind of approach!! Every piece of bread you eat brings you nearer to death. Bread is associated with all the major diseases of the body. For example, nearly all sick people have eaten bread.

The effects are obviously cumulative: Primitive tribal societies that have no bread exhibit a low incidence of cancer, Alzheimer's, Parkinson's disease, and osteoporosis. More than 98 percent of convicted felons are bread users. Fully HALF of all children who grow up in bread-consuming households score below average on standardized tests.

Newborn babies can choke on bread. Most bread eaters are utterly unable to distinguish between significant scientific fact and meaningless statistical babbling.

From time to time the media is filled with the latest 'miracle cure' - a natural source of some incredible vitamin or substance that will stop prostate cancer dead in its tracks. There is feverish activity on the Internet as men exchange information about the best dosage, the cheapest source, what to avoid. Since then there have been some talk of mangos being simply the best - maybe the 'global warming' will result in a glut of them? Now soy is out. When I started on non-radical treatment of PCa seven years ago, soy was big! They don't get prostate cancer in Japan and China very much, so soy must be part of it.

The next biggee was vitamin C.

It cures colds, seems to boost the immune system, and Linus Pauling lived a long time. Take lots of vit. Some multi-vitamins have that much. For a while curcumin was the hot remedy. People in India don't get PCa very often. Besides turning your pee yellow, it doesn't appear to do anything for the genito-urinary tract, prostate included. Grapefruit juice had a good run for a while until it was discovered that some of the life saving heart drugs stopped saving and stopped the heart instead when mixed with grapefruit juice - especially for those men who drank a gallon a day.

If some is good - more must be better. Of course, there was selenium. I recall some doctor who gulped tens of thousands of units of the stuff before dying of PCa. Now, we hear, anything above is useless, maybe harmful. Oops, oops, and more oops. And what about those green cruciferous vegetables - your folks were right when they told you to eat your Brussel sprouts and broccoli - real life savers!

Why, Johns Hopkins Memorial Hospital even tried to claim copyright for the seeds. Hope they didn't sink too much in the project as these veggies were relegated to where they'd been before - uneaten. Chocolate and red wine keep swinging in and out of favour - amazing how things we like can be SO good for us - and the manufacturers and growers. Mind you chocolate has been around as a cure- all for many centuries.

And what about cranberries? How the growers must have rejoiced when that cure took off! Let's not even discuss vitamin E which nobody can rigorously attribute anything to, not even helping the heart. And whether its gamma, or alpha, or whatever, is even up for debate. For a while there was Celebrex; the anti-inflammatories were big. How many oop-ses is that?

Well, now, all of a sudden vitamin D is the Cure du Jour. How long will that last? Probably until someone finds out that in high doses it has some terrible secondary effect. After all, we've been told for years how BAD it was for you due to the effect of sun's rays on your skin. Ah, all those poor oldsters in Miami Beach: If they only knew how bad vitamin D was for them Or is it good for them as they bake into their 90s? Take yer pick - but don't forget your pomegranate juice futures - it could be the next big thing. Trading Places on ADT. Here are some of the things you'll share: This cartoon may also resonate with men on ADT: Who to choose- Oh who to choose?

Roll the dice, Win or lose. To treat quick and dirty, It's seeding with Critz. To image the prostate, See Kurhaniewicz. Your prostate is gone! Brachytherapy options Also come in high dose, So go off to Tulsa Although it's not close. Or see Grimm and Blasko, The best in the West. If ice balls sound good, Gary Onik is nifty.

Freeze out that tumor, Be you eighty or fifty. Before doing anything, Learn all you can, And cancer will be Just a flash in the pan.

Donna explained how this work came about: It was midnight in Milwaukee On a crisp cold Christmas eve. While waiting up for Santa, Thought I'd see what I'd conceive, To make my worldwide family, Laugh, smile, giggle or guffaw.

Be it Haiku, dirty limerick, Narrative or blank verse, I sometimes sit and wonder, If writing is a curse! The Empowered Patients Guide. This book is a wonderful source of very detailed information. It is not an 'easy read' to glance through while lounging by the pool, but it allows laypeople to get a good understanding of complex medical issues associated with prostate cancer.

And, in passing and talking of doctors, which of these kids is likely to land up as a urologist? There is, of course no way of knowing that a doctor is being honest but evasive answers can often be detected and this section of the site may help. The man who authored most of it said that his first urologist claimed success rates as good as Dr.

When he expressed surprise, the urologist even went to the extent of suggesting that perhaps Dr. Walsh was slipping, describing him as a "senile old man". But our man had seen a recent videotape of Dr. Walsh giving a presentation and knew he was far from senile, so he pressed this urologist for details. Under pressure he admitted that he did not actively follow-up on his patients and didn't really know how many of his patients had undetectable PSAs at five years. Here are some phrases to watch out for: Or maybe not so rare!

A task that clearly daunts. Many of us handle health problems better if we understand them. And since Humor is generally accepted to be powerful medicine, Humorous Knowledge could even be curative! And so we turn to the funny side of Prostate Cancer. A near naked, emaciated old man, in obvious need of food and water, and covered in dirt, grime, and dried blood, is chained to the damp wall of a rat infested cell.

He groans in pain from his bleeding wounds. A rescuer bursts in, sees the pathetic creature, and cries out: And the word was prostate. This is the essence of what has frequently been referred to as 'The Prostate Conspiracy. Etymologically, constate is derived from the French verb constater, to establish or ascertain the facts. Thus Pro-State P definitions are those preferred by the medical community. Con-State C definitions reflect the realities of Prostate Cancer - as perceived by the patient.

A gland surrounding the urethra and immediately below the bladder, or C: We've been deceived and confused for too long. The correct word, that many of us say anyway, is clearly Prostrate. Originally from the British: And so to the rest of the Grossary List: To remove, reduce, or destroy tissue or a system. For example, Hormone Ablation: Digital Rectal Examination; insertion of a gloved, lubricated finger into the rectum to feel the prostate, or C: Diabolically Revolting Experience Dysplasia P: Dysplasia; also known as PIN: State of discontent declared by Southern Urologists when their patients abandon them in favor of radiologists Epstein, Jonathan P: Son of Albert Einstein and developer of a universally accepted theory of relativity: The state of being unable to have or maintain an erection, or C: Clearly a typographical variant of 'I'm potent;' often claimed by the impotent - in denial Incontinent P: Loss of urinary control, or C: As most PC patients know, the word is actually incompetent inadequate; unable to function properly.

A set of exercises designed to improve the strength of the muscles used in urinating, or C: The lifting and subsequent consumption of a keg of beer in order to stimulate urinary flow and control LH P: Luteinizing Hormone; a pituitary hormone that stimulates the production of testosterone, or C: The cry of a fallen woman - accompanied by a lute concerto. Orchiectomy or Orchidectomy P: Removal of the testes by surgical castration, or C: The removal of an orchid from its natural habitat Now honestly, of the two explanations, which one do you want to hear?

A tumor-inhibitory protein, or C: The 'long standing' record of 53 nighttime pees. It was during his extraordinary record-shattering achievement, that Paul J. The previous record Palpable P: Capable of being felt during a physical examination; in the case of prostate cancer, this normally refers to some form of abnormality of the prostate which can be felt during a DRE see above , or C: Despite frequent patient statements to the contrary, an abnormal prostate is not palatable tasty; appetizing.

Prostate Cancer; Prostatic Cancer, or C: Clearly a filched abbreviation. Various acceptable definitions of PC include: This may be the place for a little wordplay as light relief. The challenge is to create 'apt anagrams' from the following fun phrases: Palladium isotope used as a radiation source in brachytherapy, or C: The external genital and excretory organs, or C: During the course of the diagnosis and treatment of PC, the need to drop one's pants occurs with increasing frequency and duration.

The term 'Private Parts' is then changed to the more appropriate 'Public Parts' - an unusual case of the definition remaining constant while the term itself is modified. Prostate-Specific Antigen, or C: P-SAD, pronounced pee sad: Response of the typical Dubliner: The canal that drains urine from the bladder through the prostate and out through the penis, or C: Greek for "I have found it! Physician specializing in the urogenital tract, or C: American counterpart of the European, Eurologist: The name presents a number of special features: CaP is an abbreviation for cancer of the prostate.

A prostate may well contain a stone; 'Capstone,' the high point, the crowning achievement; and 'Carter,' a prominent name in the 'anals' of prostate disease. All I want to tell you why I think those of us with prostate CA are like helicopter pilots. I present the following: The thing is, helicopters are different from planes. An airplane by its nature wants to fly, and if not interfered with too strongly by unusual events or by a deliberately incompetent pilot, it will fly. A helicopter does not want to fly.

'Life is not a dress rehearsal'

It is maintained in the air by a variety of forces and controls working in opposition to each other; and if there is any disturbance in the delicate balance, the helicopter stops flying immediately and disastrously. There is no such thing as a gliding helicopter. This is why being a helicopter pilot is so different from being an airplane pilot, and why, in general, airplane pilots are open, clear-eyed, buoyant extroverts, and helicopter pilots are brooders, introspective anticipators of trouble. They know if anything bad has not happened, it is about to.

We members of TROOPC are like helicopter pilots because like them, we know that if something bad has not happened, it is about to. What does HMO stand for? I just joined an HMO. How difficult will it be to choose the doctor I want? Just slightly more difficult than choosing your parents.

Follow Dave

Your insurer will provide you with a book listing all the doctors in the plan. These doctors basically fall into two categories-those who are no longer accepting new patients, and those who will see you but are no longer participating in the plan. But don't worry; the remaining doctor who is still in the plan and accepting new patients has an office just a half-day's drive away, and a diploma from a Third World country. Do all diagnostic procedures require pre-certification?

Only those you need. Can I get coverage for my preexisting conditions? Certainly, as long as they don't require any treatment. What happens if I want to try alternative forms of medicine? You'll need to find alternative forms of payment. My pharmacy plan only covers generic drugs, but I need the name brand.

I tried the Generic Medication, but it gave me a stomach ache. What should I do? Poke yourself in the eye. What if I'm away from home and I get sick? You really shouldn't do that. I think I need to see a specialist, but my doctor insists he can handle my problem. Can a general practitioner really perform a heart transplant right in his office?

Will health care be different in the next century? But if you call right now, you might get an appointment by then. His specialist is talking about his spontaneous remission - which he refers to as a 'cure': The patients make up their minds to beat cancer and also to beat the doctor who implied that they couldn't. A prostate biopsy is like having a 21 gun salute shot up your ass. You can shake and dance Like you've got ants!! But the last few drops, Go in your pants!!

Many more men die with prostate cancer that of it. Growing old is invariably fatal. Prostate cancer is only sometimes so. Unfortunately, we appear to be living in a time when physician income is more important than patient outcome. Is cure necessary in those in whom it may be possible, and is cure possible in those in whom it is necessary?

It is OK to keep an open mind as long as you do not let your brain to fall out. Free translation from Hebrew. For the vast majority of men with a recent diagnosis of prostate cancer the most important question is not what treatment is needed, but whether any treatment at all is required. The deep-rooted fear about cancer may drive the decision-making process, rather than scientific evidence. An error does not become truth by reason of multiplied propagation, nor does the truth become error because nobody will see it.

When I went to see the first urologist, I had to admit to wilful ignorance. I asked him, "What does the prostate do? Post on an Internet Forum. Robert F Kennedy, South Africa. Each time a man stands up for an ideal or acts to improve the lot of others or strikes out against injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope.

And crossing each other from a million different centres of energy and daring, those ripples build a mighty current that can sweep down the mightiest walls of oppression and resistance. I wrote this piece about three years after my diagnosis and my choice of what was then termed Watchful Waiting. I think it sums up some of the issues all men who have been diagnosed with prostate cancer face as they await their PSA tests.

The dawn is coloring the sky as I write this. Soon it will be light enough to see the whales in the bay beneath my window. They are calving and mating. At sunrise, my dogs and I will take our daily walk up the mountains behind the house. The spring flowers - what we call fynbos - are beginning to blossom and there is color everywhere. Later in the day, or perhaps tomorrow, my wife and I will drive up the coast to see the wild flowers which are all in full bloom and creating a kaleidoscope of the bush land. Everything is wonderful and it is great to be alive. This week I must get my PSA count checked again.

The thought is not a happy one. If it has stayed down, we cannot celebrate our good fortune. We will merely know that the beast still appears to be caged. But we do not know for sure. Many people are only too pleased to tell us about others who have metastases with low PSA counts. Bad news has many companions. Perhaps too the doctors are right who have said that the regimen I am following is merely masking the spread.

But we'll maybe only know the answer to that in twenty years time, with a bit of luck.

Navigation

And if the count is up? What to do then? Is it a blip in the chart? Is it the genuine thing? The wait for the next test will be awful if this one is up. But that is what we have to live with, all of us who have been diagnosed with this disease, no matter what action we have taken. Always looking over our shoulders to see if the beast is out and after us. It's hard on all of us, and even more so on the lonely road of holistic medicine I have chosen. Without hope, it would be impossible, I think.

Some years later Andy Ripley put it even better, writing this three years before his death: Harley's Poem - "Winter Trees". Sadly Ric finally lost his battle in May The Prostrated Prostate Blues. Click here to visit his webpage and then click on the " Play " button on the right side of that page to listen to a recording of his song. Stockton Political Junkie Goes West: Joe Tolo Capitol Chat: Corks Or Screw Caps? Mary Political Junkie Goes West: Adopting Older Pets News Network: Problems In Geometry Sound Advice: Andy McKee News Network: Latest From Washington D.

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