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White Space Van Man Series

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A not so distant future,In a galaxy so close it is in fact, this one White Space-Van Man revs off.

Workshy slob and long term redundant doughnut Barry is a modern man, well, he takes the bins out and it has been known that, sometimes, he even washes up the dishes. When his good intentions to generally skive and dodge his job centre interview horribly backfires in the worst possible way, our anti-hero tub of lard is offered some work experience, 22nd century style.

Will he succeed in becoming the saviour of the human race while carrying out his newfound employment as a pilot of a white space-van with efficiency and productivity, or is this all really some kind of horrible trick to prise him off of his sofa? Does Barry really care, he has a Cornish pasty and he's quite happy with that?

I hate book blurbs that end with lots of questions, don't you? Praises be to the almighty White Space-Van Man, and we never even paid these reviewers: I am always sceptical with authors I do not know but after I bought this on I was hooked and believe this to be a literary marvel and for comedy styling, its up there with P G Wodehouse. I believe this man will go far and if not I want a full enquiry in to why not You will never look at a van driver in the same light again.

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Set way into the future, this book charts the adventures of Barry the Space Van Man. There is more to it than just Barry, but I don't want to spoil your fun. The really great thing about Barry is that as he travels the galaxy in his white space van, he's just like the stereotypical white van drive today, it's brilliant.

I went to the nuclear plant at Leiston once!

I cannot be bored. He knows true boredom. Most of those I meet drive alone in their vehicles. Tony Capener, a joiner taking furniture around London, today has a trio of young apprentices crammed into his van with him. Capener schools them in mood management. Got to learn not to mind traffic. Just about every driver I encounter stresses forbearance as a key professional tool. Do any amount of car-spotting, says Frank Hunt, 69, in the middle of a run from Southampton to Ely to deliver air conditioners.

Stop for Burger Kings or count the number of ripped tyres on the road both of which distractions Hunt has tried in the last few hours. I come across a uniformed courier, Ali Waqasali, 29, without a lot of choice in the matter. He crosses, avoiding a van from the National Grid and almost getting struck by another. Waqasali works for the courier giant DPD, which has 3, delivery vehicles on the road. He carries a parcel from the clothing firm Asos in one hand and a large device like a raygun in the other.

Waqasali reaches an apartment block and rings the bell. His device has a ticking timer on its display, a customer having been promised their Asos box within a specific hour. Ten, nine, eight… Waqasali shoves inside, takes the apartment stairs two at a time, and is back on the road within a minute. He lets a succession of vans pass by before crossing back over the road. The DHL van, squat and yellow, creeps north in the direction of Knightsbridge. They brand these things Boxer and Master for a reason. I do get to know a driver called Christie Shackleton, 20, from Edinburgh, who spent eight happy months bombing around north-east Scotland in an LDV last year, ferrying napkins and tablecloths for a wedding firm.

When I intercept the driver, she gasps: Orsa hurries away and I stay to watch an intricate little van-ballet play out in her wake, half a dozen couriers parking on the same patch of Knightsbridge kerb within minutes of each other.

We do Man and Van services in London

In a recent government survey of the labour force, , people identified van-driving as their main occupation, up 50, on the year before. We notice you are using a browser version that we do not support. His obnoxious and selfish employers depress him, his family ignore him, his colleagues assist his irritation with merciless banter, and even the onboard computer drives him up the wall, across the ceiling and out through the sunroof. Which office workers would accept judgment on the clutter of their desks? Subjects Fiction Humor Fiction. This is a great asset to our service, as it means if you require advance information about your driver or cant find him at the start of your job, we can act as the middle man to gps targeting our van driver and getting them to you as soon as possible!

A black van run by Addison Lee Courier and a white van from ecourier. Online shopping continues to grow year on year , and more and more of us, more and more often, buy our stuff by squinting at 2D images, punching in a three-digit security code and waiting for tangible goodies to appear on our doorsteps.

Can we ever love White Van Man?

In Knightsbridge, I watch an endless relay of ignitions and central-locking clicks, of punched-on hazard lights and harried-looking drivers undertaking obstacle runs, in and out of shops, with the focused urgency of Olympic steeplechasers. The guy from ecourier. I get up close to see the slogan stitched on its breast: Roughly that, while the van driver who spends serious time on British roads learns to be stoical or quickly goes mad, we customers and consumers have become impatient about delay of any sort.

The local pharmacy should have our perishable medicine whenever we choose to stroll in. Kicking our heels longer than a week for a delivery has become pretty much unacceptable. Quietly, every quarter, another 80, vans take to the road.

What to expect from shift

These armadas are relatively inexpensive to finance because of historically low interest rates. Most significantly, vans are easy to fill with drivers because anyone with a basic licence can hop in and go. Limits that curtail the amount of hours a day a lorry driver can spend on the road do not apply to van drivers, either: Cartwright worries about reputational damage and an enforcing of the negative stereotypes. We all know them: Out on the road, I spend a good while behind a Renault Kangoo that has a large, detailed penis drawn into the soot of its rear doors.

In its brazenness, it makes me think of the time I was out with a group of female friends and a driver projected himself through the window of his van to sing at the girls: There used to be a larger sticker on his bonnet, explains Lucas, bespectacled and wearing a flat cap.

A gift from his wife, the year-old explains, something to keep his spirits up during runs on the A Lucas manages cleaning projects in Redbridge, driving circuits between them. We take off on his usual route. He recalls the event, how he was tested in various categories. I won fuel economy. I won harsh braking. We drive another lap of the A12, in convoy with an AA van, travelling faster, and an unmarked white Renault with paving slabs in its open flatbed, travelling faster still.

The ones that bully on the road, the ones that drive hard, drive stupid, they put a stigma on the community.