I am not mean, I am Honest

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However, do your best to make it constructive and not destructive. Find ways to speak kindly to people and offer to help them.

honest - Dictionary Definition : www.farmersmarketmusic.com

Is there anything I can do to help you to get these tasks done on time? Let them have a choice to discuss the issue. Perhaps you have strong convictions you wish others would see as truth. You might be entirely correct or on higher moral grounds in your ways, but you cannot force an issue onto someone else.

if I'm honest

For example, you might have strong religious values or moral beliefs. Often, forceful discussions turn people off instead of allowing them to appreciate your perspective. Be sensitive to the other person. Listen to the other person and consider their feelings. If they sound uncomfortable or shocked, tailor your words to be softer or more gentle. Be aware of their communication and how your words are being interpreted. If they are avoiding eye contact, crossing their body, or looking like they want to leave the conversation as soon as possible, consider changing your tone.

Be conscious about how the other person feels or might feel while you speak to them. However the person acts or responds is valid. Let them know you understand and are sensitive to their feelings. See the positives, not just the negatives. Maybe you tend to be critical in your approach to life. Balance your negative thinking with some positive things they do or say. Refuse to tell them what they are doing wrong and instead, focus on your concern.

Be discerning in what you address and how you address it. Avoid blaming the person. You might be working with someone and be late on a deadline.

Instead of blaming someone, find ways to work together instead of trying to find someone to blame. Use an approachable tone. Aim to use a casual tone or professional tone when talking to someone.

“I’m Not Blunt or Rude, I’m Just Honest and Direct”

Harshness can come out through tone, so avoid responding too quickly, using sharp words or speech, or speaking loudly. For example, speak softer to avoid sounding aggressive. Maybe a friend has a bad habit that drives you nuts. Instead, add some humor to approach the topic gently. This allows you to say what you need to say but also not make a big deal over it.

Make a small joke or say something silly to get your point across. Avoid the question, if necessary. Maybe someone asks you a question that makes you uncomfortable in giving an honest response.

11 thoughts on “Why “Brutal Honesty” Isn’t Honest At All”

Aim to be general or respond to something regarding the topic they bring up. This allows you to be honest yet still kind and inoffensive. You can just say to them, "It's your choice if you want to believe me or not. But at least I told you honestly everything from the heart. Not Helpful 4 Helpful How many episodes where there? Is there documentation of the situation that supports your concern? Share your opinions as opinions, not as facts.

Have you ever watched a political debate?

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Why do they do that? Because they want to make their opinions seem like facts. You and I do this as well. Stories and opinions can be changed and molded. Realize honesty is not what you think it is. This idea comes from a misunderstanding about what it means to be honest. Being more honest is about being more clear, more specific, more sincere, and more authentic.

11 thoughts on “Why “Brutal Honesty” Isn’t Honest At All”

You DO need to be more effective at stating the observable facts of the situation and your honest perspective about those facts. My model for starting even the toughest conversations is this:. As I have often expressed, our goal as communicators is to allow all people to feel comfortable and respected in our presence while standing our own ground and getting our message across.

Honest — Merriam Webster Definition: I believe that honesty is absolutely imperative. It is a non-negotiable characteristic of respectful communication. I also believe it is important to be honest without being harsh. Being honest therefore meets the challenge of our goal as communicators. Direct — Merriam Webster Definition: Respectful communication is usually direct.

I say respectful communication is usually direct, because sometimes to avoid being harsh, it is best to be more circumspect, or to be silent. Sometimes, what needs to be told to be truthful, is not OUR truth to tell. Blunt — Merriam Webster Definition: Respectful communication is rarely blunt. To be blunt is to speak without thinking about the consequences of your words and how they may be perceived by others. I say respectful communication is rarely blunt, because there are some situations when it is necessary for safety or clarity to just blurt out what needs to be said.

We hope these are few and far between.

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